Saturday, September 25, 2010

The Roller Coaster: Looking Up

This is the first post in a special bi-weekly series.  It's a sequel to The Longest Weekend of My Life series.  Please check back next Wednesday for Part 2.

Part 1: Looking Up

The Tuesday after the Longest Weekend of My Life I decided to call my midwife. After telling her what had happened over the weekend, she told me she thought the immediate suspicion of ectopic pregnancy based on my pain and proof of pregnancy alone was a bit of a leap. She said that with my history and having had absolutely no pregnancy complications and no risk factors, it was unlikely to be an ectopic pregnancy. I told her that I'd made an appointment with the OB for a 10 week ultrasound for my husband's peace of mind, and she told me that her birth suite now has the capability of doing ultrasounds and billing my insurance. I almost jumped for joy! I felt much more comfortable going to her for an ultrasound and canceling the OB appointment altogether. I told my husband, and he was very supportive of my choice.

I called the OB's office on Wednesday to cancel the appointment. The receptionist, who'd been working there for the past 10 years our family had been going to that office, seemed disappointed. She said “So you're not going to go with us?” I said no and explained that since my home birth midwife now offered ultrasound I would be seeing her for all of my prenatal needs. The receptionist, who had asked me about my home birth experience last year, didn't say anything else. I think maybe she didn't know what to say.

I thought about it. I wondered why the receptionist was sad that I wouldn't be going to their office for my pregnancy. After all, home birth is what I felt was safer and more beautiful anyway, and I couldn't have been more thrilled about my plans. I also felt much happier knowing I wouldn't need to have any unnecessary pelvic exams or other tests or interventions for the sake of routine. I hung up the phone feeling very good about my future.

That night I talked with my husband. He told me that his feelings of fear were easing and he was starting to feel a lot better about the situation we had found ourselves in. In fact, he was feeling hopeful, optimistic, and excited about the pregnancy for the first time since we'd discovered it. He had even confided in a close friend about what we were going through. This was great progress, and both of us were feeling like we were now in the clear with smooth sailing ahead.

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