Showing posts with label power. Show all posts
Showing posts with label power. Show all posts

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

The Raw Truth About Power and Control

Who controls birth?


I came across an article on MSNBC by Taffy Brodessor-Akner called Who controls childbirth - expectant moms or doctors?


In her article, Ms. Brodessor-Akner talks about the extremely traumatic birth of her first child and the impending birth of her second child. She opens up with her raw feelings, and it's powerful. She talks about her journey, of trying to heal and move forward, of facing the future with the hope of something better.

The author also talks about home birth but admits that she's not comfortable birthing anywhere but in the hospital.  The feelings and questions that she brings up in her article are so poignant, and I think they bear careful consideration. This article reminds me of how each and every birth is individual and sacred, and should be handled with appropriate care. Each mother and father should make the choices they feel are best for that birth, regardless of what happened at previous births or what so-and-so says and what everyone else thinks they should do. It's a personal decision, each and every step of the way.

In response to the article, Sheridan at Enjoy Birth asks the same question: Who DOES Control Childbirth? She argues that it depends on who the mother chooses as her care provider. She also provides a library of information to help women make the best choice in care provider for their child's birth, and lots of reasons why they should be judicious in their choice.

She has a point. Afterall, the woman's choice in her care giver determines how much power and decision-making she will give up. Giving power to someone isn't bad, if that person truly has your best interests at heart and understands and supports them.

In my personal experiences with birth, it has all been about control. Whether I have a positive or negative experience depends largely on how much I feel control was either respected or taken from me. I feel this was dependent on how much control I gave to others, and in whom I chose to trust with that power.

In this respect, I think Sheridan is absolutely right, and I also feel a woman's realm of control in birth extends further than her choice in a provider. She also has the power to choose her support team, the location and circumstances under which she wants to labor and give birth.

Can you really determine the circumstances of your baby's birth? In her MSNBC article, Ms. Brodessor-Akner talks about how unpredictable childbirth is, and how birth plans are a waste of time because of this. Yes, birth is unpredictable, but women still have power in the interventions they choose to accept or avoid. They can choose under what circumstances they want to labor and birth by choosing whether to allow a medical induction or augmentation, or to wait for spontaneous labor to start on its own. They can choose whether to birth in a place where certain things are required as "protocol", such as electronic fetal monitoring, breaking of waters, IV placement, and more. They can decide which interventions to accept or decline, and their decision in care provider and location will have a large impact on these other aspects.

I believe as we attempt to exert control in pregnancy and birth, we must also come to terms with a certain lack of control. This is where faith comes in. I do everything possible to educate myself to make the best decisions, and as I move forward knowing I've extended the limit of my personal power, I trust in something bigger, more powerful to guide me through. For some people this is a trust in nature, in our bodies to perform as they were made to.

For me, it's faith in God.

As I see it, God created the world and everything in it. He is nature. He created me, and He knows what I'm capable of. God has control in things I don't, and He has my best interests in mind.

"The next moment is as much beyond our grasp, and as much in God's care, as that a hundred years away. Care for the next minute is as foolish as care for a day in the next thousand years. In neither can we do anything, in both God is doing everything." ~ C.S. Lewis

What do you think? Who controls birth?

Friday, January 15, 2010

Power in Birth

For me choosing unmedicated birth is partially a matter of control. When I was in labor with my first child I felt completely out of control, helpless. The hospital staff were telling me what I should do, and since I didn't know I had other options, I fearfully complied. I gave in to the epidural because I felt I had no other choice, and I couldn't handle the pain in those circumstances. I felt I had somehow failed for giving in, but I couldn't see how I could have done any differently.

The more I learned and the more support I sought, the more I was able to claim my own power and take control of my birth experiences. I feel powerful when I give birth without medication. I would rather feel everything, from the most intense pain to the unbelievable ecstasy of birth, than to be numb to the whole experience. There's nothing that compares to it, and being able to master the kind of control you have in birth is a monumental accomplishment. It's a beautiful balance of control and submission, and once you experience that you are never the same person again.

Birth has also been very faith-promoting for me, as I put my faith in God, and He is the one I trust to guide me in the process of working with my body and my baby. It's not about pain.